Thursday, January 6, 2011

Why I can forget that dream job at Strippers.

Some of our friends bought a house in August.  This house is near my brother's & some other friend's & the former owners were notorious for throwing wild parties.  I mean WILD.  You've seen pictures of some of my parties & let me tell you, from what I hear, they are cake & ice cream compared to these.  I guess somebody's got to give the night shift at the PD something to do.

This house was party-ready; pool, outdoor kitchen with fireplace, even a party barn complete with stripper pole!  Technically it's really a support beam, but could have fooled me.

I have been attempting this pole since they moved in, to no avail.  I don't think I'll ever get my dream job at Strippers.  Isn't that such a creative name?  Imagine how I explained to my 9-year-old what Strippers is... That (I can't do it) & the fact that anybody that would pay money to see all this sagginess & streached-outness I've got going up in here, except my husband, is pretty hard-up.

My attempt to spin around it.  Fail.  I think I about fell down & I know I hurt my back.
I really don't know who this chic with the wide booty is or why she has on my outfit.
Here she is again.  I really think I could have done it on NYE, if my arms hadn't been so sore from Wii boxing & bowling.
I couldn't, but my cousin's new girlfriend could.  Remember the one whose (now ex) wife burnt their house down, the garden tool?  Well this is the upgrade.  150% better, looks & personality.  Plus, she can work a pole. I guess that's a bonus for him.  That's TMI for me.
 B could do it!  I don't know if that's a good thing or bad.

 Sass can too. And so can Bo, but they think it's a fireman's pole.
Obviously I'm not very modest, because these pictures of me are horrible! I just wanted to give y'all something to laugh about...


Screen Door Prep said...

Too funny. & you're right - I thought *your* parties looked like a blast...I think this party pad might require too much energy for me. ;)

You know, they say pole-dancing is supposed to be quite the workout...so I guess if there is an element of difficulty to it, maybe "they" are right in claiming that!

LOL Great post. =)

Unknown said...

Umm yeah I couldn't do it either so don't feel lonely. I have no doubt that is one heck of a workout..

Anonymous said...

You made me laugh SO hard with this girl! I so enjoy reading your blog. I agree with you 150% about the new girlfriend! We all liked her too! Hope you are all doing good!


Dawn M. said...

looks like the perfect place to hire a 'stripper' friend to teach all the wives/girlfriends how to really work that pole, LOL. There would be some really, really happy men to have these techniques then practiced at home where not only can they see but touch too. There's something wierd though about seeing the dude on the pole.

Joshlin said...

I just found your blog and am now your newest follower. You are so funny. I have been reading some of your older posts and have been sitting here laughing my butt off! So happy to have found you!

mFw said...

I could never climb that pole either! Sounds like such a fun house!!

Joy said...

HAHA that looks like a man's dream room-stripper pole and lots of dead deer on the wall ;) well at least my hubby's dream room! I am not gonna let him see this cause he is in the process of converting the garage to the man cave and I don't want him getting any ideas-cause this girl won't be working the pole, mainly cause I would probably suck at it and make a fool of myself!

Gracie Beth said...

This is why we are friends. If I ever move to your neck of the woods after graduation we are taking a stripaerobics class together!

nomo wino daph said...


Now, where is my invite to your par-tay? We would have so much fun together:)

FYI: I deleted my personal facebook- didnt want you to think i blocked ya!

Hope your weekend is great-

Kate Lewis said...

Holy COW! I don't know what would happen if an etiquette lady (as my children so affectionally refer to me) tried to work a pole. But, the whole thing...this post, your pics, my imagination...cracks me up!

Heather said...

Nice to meet you!!

A for effort on the pole!

I am glad we know no one with one of these, my husband would want us to keep visiting until I mastered it!

Babes Mami said...

Fabulous! I know a club up here in Greenville you could work. The saggy, stretched out c section scarred look is what they are after!

RN Mama said...

Sigh. And I was jealous of your parties before!! When I saw your NYE pictures on Facebook, you actually had me at the outdoor fireplace...the stripper pole is just the icing on the cake!!

Mrs4444 said...

Had to come back to read this post--I'm glad I did. Thanks for the LOL!

I think someone should come up with a restaurant for women only--They could call it Peters. The sexy waiters could be required to wear tight jeans that show off their packages.heehee

KT said...

OK, this may be TMI but I have a stripper pole in my house. It is a portable one, and I really only use it for exercise. Honestly! I've had it for a few years and it is awesomely fun!

Jennifer said...

I think we need a video to get the full effect. Yep. A video.

Sandra said...

You're so funny! There was no chick with a wide booty! There was however a sexy chick working that pole!
Love how you're dancing around it but everyone else is climbing it!

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