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Wednesday, August 25, 2010

PYHO: My Husband, the Checkbook



Let me preface this by saying I really love my husband & I'm blessed to have him in my life.  We rarely argue & enjoy being a couple.  (He reads)

With that being said, he drives me crazy when it comes to money!  I know, money is supposed to be the #1 cause of divorce. Personally I don't know anyone that has divorced over money; adultery, immaturity & stupidness maybe, not money. 

The reason he irritates me so much is because it's okay for him to spend $2000 on a 4-wheeler (that we don't need) just because it was a good deal & Lord only knows how much on golf clubs but I know it was $679 to Edwin Watts last month.  He will only wear Polo t-shirts (Bo is following it his footsteps) & Columbia shorts to FARM in. And Tommy Bahama shorts for the golf course.  Granted I have nice clothes, but the majority of my everyday clothes came from Target or Old Navy. 

As I have said before, he is stuck in the 80s or rather 40s when it comes to money.  He is mainly a cash-only person, only uses checks to pay bills (there's no way in hell he would EVER do online banking) & he only likes to use his credit card (yes, only one) for "emergencies" & ordering golf clubs from Edwin Watts.

On a few occasions, he will let me use the sacred plastic, like for ordering clothes, shoes, bookbags for the children & it never fails, he raises hell about how much I spend.  Let me just tell you that I am not a shopper & I spend far less money than most of my friends. I don't have a job or source of income so I have to depend on him for every dime.  And he fusses all the time & even the migrant workers call me "dinero".  But guess who purchases just about EVERYTHING that comes into this house, from birthday gifts for all those parties to freaking toilet paper. ME!

Well yesterday the bill came, and of course, I spent too much money!  So he yelled, while I watched TV, & will be withholding certain privileges until further notice & cut up the damn card!  Good. That just means we don't have to go to WDW because you can't make reservations with cash.

Tracie from Stir-Fry Awesomeness refers to her husband as Toaster Oven because her momma says husbands are like toaster ovens because every girl thinks she needs to have one then finds out she would have been just fine without it.  So from now on, I will refer to Retro as Checkbook because he pays the bills but that's about it including pretty much anything that has to do with the children.

And I've decided I need a job. So if you know anyone that will hire me to do pretty much nothing (or just blog) from 9-12 on Tuesdays, Wednesdays & Thursdays & pay better than my current boss (Checkbook) please let me know. 

*All my friends said I'm spoiled, but I do have to listen it every now & then.*

28 comments:

RN Mama said...

I have to admit...the sole reason I have a part-time job is so my husband can't boss me around about money. Somehow, I feel like if I'm contributing, then I have some say...know what I mean?

With that being said, I think checkbook is being sort of a drama queen here!

Steph @ Flip Flop Chic said...

Hubby spoils me rotten to no end, but I can speak from past experience. My ex was this way - it was fine to consume $100 in beer and cigarettes a week, but Heaven forbid I buy some new toys for my stepson (HIS flesh & blood). It has taken Hubby about the entire 3 years since I stopped working to get me comfortable with spending his on ANYTHING!

Suburban Princess said...

Yikes! Does he see you as his chattel too?

I am dependant on my husband for every dime too but he would never hold it against me. It's time for your husband to show a little respect for the mother of his children. Perhaps remind the migrant workers that they might not want someone speaking that way about their mothers.

Or just send me to kick his a$$.

Babes Mami said...

I too am dependent on my husband for almost all money but he lets me spend within reason.

Checkbook needs to get it together because I think he's confused about prices and things that are needed.

Golf clubs aren't one of them.

High Heeled Life said...

Men , I'm discovering are most interesting. Along with selective hearing, they often have selective seeing... Has Retro ..ummm I mean Checkbook ... ever taken on the actual chore of purchasing household items? That may be a way for him to see exactly how much it really costs to run a household, part of that is social activities and attending birthdays etc.

If you lived closer my friend , your available hours and days would be perferct ... I would hire you!! XO HHL

Lourie said...

I am the money manager, however I suck at it, and I give in to wants of others *cough* husband...erm TO. Love Tracie for that one!... If you find someone who pays to blog for those same hours, let me know if they need more than one. ;)

Shell said...

Don't get me started on my husband and money. I may never stop.

If you find that job, see if you can get me one, too!

mommy said...

EEK sorry, I know how this goes! Glad to know that me & my husband aren't the only ones who have regular quarrels about money!

Jennifer said...

One of the #1 advantages to working is that he can't say one thing about spending money (we make about the same). Plus I pay the bills so he has no idea how much money we spend on stuff.

Helena said...

It's a privilege to have a wife that cares about the house and kids. He needs to get over thinking that the privilege comes for cheap or free.

Jennifer said...

Amen!

MommyLovesStilettos said...

Checkbook is being a DRAAAAAMMMMMMA QUEEN!

I am not married but we might as well be. We have separate accounts and he pays all the house bills. He pays for half the groceries and I buy stuff like toilet paper, cleaning supplies, stuff the kids need, etc.

I've been married and been a SAHM and I Hated it when I had to answer to my husband about what I spent and where. If we ever get married, we're keeping separate accounts! :) LOL

SueMac said...

I have a job and Hubs says I still spend too much money on EVERYTHING!

Laura said...

I'm in the same boat. Remember, we've got two house notes right now! Every time I spend money on the new house, I get yelled out! I should have never turned the freakin' finances over to him! Who's the CPA in the family??

Just Another Mom of 2 said...

Sign me up to that job!! I understand the feeling. And you know, I look forward to eventually working, but couldn't take away from my kids at the moment since I'm able to make the choice (most of the time). However, I think another income would make this conversation even worse!!

Amber D said...

This cracks me up! Tell "checkbook" to cut you some slack....peach season's been good this year.

Helene said...

There must be nothing worse than feeling like you have to explain every single nickel and dime to him...your "job" is staying home with the kids, taking care of him while he's at work. It just so happens that your job is not a paid position. There was some study done recently that figured that a SAHM's salary would be well over $100k a year...let him know that!

Trust me, he'll bitch more about having to fork out money for childcare if you have to go back to work. It's time to set that boy straight!

Withholding sex works too. But you already know that...LOL!!

Tales From My Empty Nest said...

I think men are all the same. They all gripe about money. And don't have a clue how much it costs to run a household. Welcome to the real world, guys!!! Good luck finding that job. Love & blessings from NC!

KT said...

Well, I am not a source of good relationship advice (twice divorced, under 40- aargh!) but I did learn that money causes more fights than anything. When I got married for the second time I suggested separate accounts so no one could bitch about the other persons spending, as long as the bills were paid. He was a saver, I was a spender. So, I am a BIG FAN of having your own money to blow on CRAP if you want to!
PS- My most recent ex-husband (trashy much?) called me Shecky because he said he felt like I was always shaking him down for something! (I can laugh about it now!)

Jane said...

I hope you find a job soon! When my daughter was growing up, I was in a similar situation. I felt it was too unfair that he got to spend so much on unnecessary stuff while I'm on my wit's end budgeting. It's so liberating to have your own money, and that he could no longer make so much fuss about the expenses.

Di said...

Have hubby take over shopping for groceries, household supplies, kid clothes, etc. I guarantee he will turn it back over to you quickly with no complaints about the amount you spend after he has to give it a shot himself!

clare said...

Don't you worry one bit. Try this, have him do all the shopping and I promise you he will spend more. I have sent my husband a couple of times to buy clothes for the kids and I always find myself shocked at what he is willing to pay for something because he doesn't want to waste his time looking around or buying when things are on sale. My husband doesn't fuss at me anymore. Try pointing out what it would cost him to have someone come in and do your job (in the house). Then again maybe he will see the error in his ways and decide a nice piece of jewelry, or shoes, is in order for you. Just sayin...

Poolside with the Girls said...

If only you HAD sued Disney!!!! $$$$$

Adrienne said...

It's tough when you're the one who does the clothes shopping, grocery shopping, etc. Of course you're the one who spends more!

Mary said...

Ha! We have 3 motorcycles in the basement, and husband is the only one who rides. We have separate checking accts. (which brings in a whole new set of problems), and I paid for most of the kids' stuff when they were little (including med. bills). And he asks me where my $ goes. HA!

Tracie said...

Your husband and I would not get along. I'm with the commenters that suggested having him do the weekly shopping to get an idea of how much things cost.

PS Thanks for the link! The TO doesn't read my blog so I can say whatever I want about him.

pink green & southern said...

Are we married to the same man?!

Miss Janice said...

My husband is King! He lets me spend money on anything I want...that's why we will both probably be living under an Interstate one day. Well, at least I'll have Louis Vuitton and Chanel in my grocery cart! I know Retro treats you good girl!

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