Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Dang Elves...

I think I'm going to have to call Santa Claus & complain. I know y'all can't wait for the explanation of that one.

Sunday afternoon, Sassy found this letter stuck in our (then) undecorated tree (the third in a series, but that's another story)-

Hi Sassy,
Santa decided to let me come back to your house again this year. And since you & Bo & Baby Girl kept me so busy bouncing from the naughty & nice lists last year, Santa thought I could use some help!
So I've brought along two of my friends, Peppermint & Sugarplum. You may have seen them sneaking around your house last year.
And since our favorite game at the North Pole is Hide & Seek we want you to find us.
Remember you must not touch us or we will disappear! Also remember what Santa said, no whining, no fighting & do what Mommy says.
Your friend,
Candy Cane the Elf

So we've got three elves hanging out all over our house moving from place to place every stinking day. Here's Sugarplum swinging from the chandelier. He's Baby Girl's warden elf.

And Peppermint, Bo's buddy, cuddled up with the frog prince beside the Christmas tree. Please excuse that huge stain on the speaker system that was a total waste of money we never use, except to put stuff on.

And, of course, there's Candy Cane waking up from a long winter's nap in his Groovy Girl sleeping bag. on top of the pantry cabinet.

Okay. So back to my beef with Santa.

These elves are NOT doing their jobs. They are supposed to make my children behave. And it's not working.

Baby Girl refuses to go to bed.
Bo refuses to wake up & get dressed. (That's a post all in itself.)
And Sassy just refuses. to act right. do her homework. mind me. be sweet to her siblings. help around the house. Have I mentioned Bo's bday party is Sunday & my housekeeper is going out of town?

I digress. If these little people don't start stepping up & do their job, I'm going to have to report them. Do elves have a union or anything?

On other note (well somewhat related)...
Would it be too mean if Santa put out all the children's (or at least one's) toys in the downstairs living room instead of the main one?

And just being nosey, does Santa wrap at your house or not. At my house, he must be waaayyy to busy to wrap much of anything. And do you get your children separate presents too, just to throw them off?


mes petit choux said...

we have a malfunctioning elf as well. Well, he worked GREAT the first day and less and less each day. Santa brings our kids three gifts. I told jack that he is going to get a gift taken away and have to do something from the "nice list" to earn it back.... i am running out of tricks under my tree :)

Sherrie said...

Okay, I so need to steal that note next year. I would have never thought of that. LOL! Granted I don't do all the "cute" and "messy" things with the elf either. LOL! Ours just hides each night to be found the next morning. But -- I'm not sure how well he's working either...we'll see.

And as for the whole Santa and wrapping thing...geez, there are so many opinions on that. We never got wrapped gifts from Santa growing up, but sometimes I throw those in. About the only orderliness around here is separate wrapping paper for each boy...one gets Santa paper, and the other gets Snowmen. Makes it easier on C'mas morning. :)

KK said...

We lost our elf when we moved here & I didn't replace him because you are right, he doesn't do his job!!!

Santa does not wrap the toys he leaves out here but he does wrap the stuff in the stockings. Don't ask me why. Wrapping all those little things is tortuous.

Anonymous said...

Oh man....mine are still little and Im not sure if that would work on mine either. My little one already likes to push boundaries. Ay yi yi....not looking forward to that!
Hope the elves start figuring out how to do their jobs or else Santas going to have a lot of angry mommas at his door!

Margaret said...

I would fire your elves that is for sure.
At my house all of the presents had to be wrapped and what not.

Laura said...

My God, Sista!! Why do you do it to yourself?! THREE stinkin elves?! Whoa!

Santa wraps for the Horton's. Everything. Except bicycles and stuff like that!

Foursons said...

One day of no elves may change their attitude. Try it and let us know what happens!

Sherrie said...

Santa wraps gifts in a different color wrap for each of my boys.

♥ Noelle ♥ said...

hahaha! those elves are priceless! my threats of santa aren't working over here with my boys either... darn it!!

Nancy C said...

That is such a creative idea. I would never have thought of that in a zillion, trillion years.

Totally stealing that next year!

Putting the FUN in DysFUNctional said...

I love the idea, but sorry it's not working so well! lol
Santa wraps here. I had never even thought of him NOT wrapping until I read about it on the internet, and I guess it's too late now. He does wrap with seperate paper, though. And I do give them gifts that are from us, to throw them off.

Princess Freckles said...

Its so funny you mention whether or not Santa wraps the presents. When I was growing up "he" did not wrap our gifts, so that we could tell the difference between the two gifts he'd bring us and the gifts from our mom. He normally brought a third as an extra because we "were sooo good all year!". Ha! Now my husband's "santa" always wrapped their gifts. I guess its different at each house. I don't think when I have kids Santa will wrap their gifts. if he does it'll be special paper.

Ashley said...

Since we don't have any kids to really do "Santa" for around our house, Santa does wrap for the rest of us (since I'm the one who wraps EVERYTHING and I can't stand seeing presents for adults thrown around the bottom of the tree). When I was growing up, my mom always wrapped my Santa presents in a wrapping paper with Santas all over it, and the ones from my family in a different paper. That worked until she used the Santa paper from the year before for the family paper... and I figured out there was no Santa haha.

Debra said...

Sorry they're not working. I would use them if they did. My daughter is being really sassy lately, too.

Santa wraps any smaller gifts but not the 'big' ones. In his own special paper (which I get to keep for next year if there is any leftover) We do buy gifts from us,too. Just a few though -usually clothes or socks or something 'boring'. :)

glitterbygrammie said...

For the elves that is a cute idea.
For the Santa wraping gifts. In our home passed from one generation to the other. Santa brings 1 gift sometimes 2 but everything else is from mom and dad. When my children were young I was a single mom and I wanted them to appreciate how hard I had to work to get them their gifts. They grew up appreciating the gifts given and also have passed it on to their children.

RN Mama said...

Ok, I was going to buy one of those elves, but now I am beginning to question their abilities!

Major Bummer! I thought they would buy me 25 days of good behavior!

Tracie said...

That's funny! I never tried the elf because I knew my kids wouldn't care. Nothing works to keep them in line.

Carri said...

Christmas is not a threat to my kids. I guess they realize it is coming one way or another sadly. Here Santa does not wrap gifts but Santa did when I was growing up. santa doesnt now because my kids are way to smart and figured out that they sell all the same paper all over. I tried explaining santa could buy things but they were not buying that.

Helene said...

Uh, yeah...we got some lazy Elves here too. Santa sent boy/girl twin Elves to watch over my kids but I keep catching the Elves slacking off, watching tv and eating popcorn.

I wonder if the Abominable Snowman would get our kids' butts in gear.

Sandra said...

Fire the elves. Send them back to the North Pole. Tell Santa they didn't do their jobs.

Onto Santa. Santa came down our chimney and placed the gifts UNWRAPPED in the living room. Gifts were arranged as if a decorator had placed them! Stocking gifts were also unwrapped. Santa doesn't have time to wrap gifts for children all over the world. And the paper gets torn up being piled in the sled. There were gifts under the tree wrapped from Mom and Dad cause it wouldn't be very nice if Mom and Dad forgot to give the children Christmas presents. ;-) xoxo

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